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When will an African team win the World Cup?

I must have heard a hundred pundits ask this question over the summer, and as many stupid answers. Africa will start producing World Cup winning sides when Europe stops taking up half the slots in the tournament. You can’t win a tournament you aren’t competing in. This isn’t rocket science, guys.

Is a robot going to take your job?

“Bloomin’ robots, taking our jobs. I mean, it was alright when they were just arms, doing hugely dangerous jobs in heavy industry, but now they can do light admin work what am I supposed to do for sixty percent of my waking life? Not hate my job? No thank you.” Who is the bad guy, the robot that takes your job or the society that doesn’t reevaluate the life/work balance of its population as technology advances because it sees ‘economic growth’ as more vital than happiness? The question shouldn’t be,… Read more Is a robot going to take your job?

Is all guitar music by boys rubbish now?

It is flippant to suggest that all new guitar music by boys is rubbish, but it kind of is, isn’t it? Or am I old now? It’s difficult to say. Getting old, losing touch with music, in a sense I was looking forward to it. I know that the drift toward nostalgia and the closing off of new avenues aren’t positive things but I have always wanted to hear a new song and think, “What is this? It’s just noise!” It should be strangely exciting to see the world move… Read more Is all guitar music by boys rubbish now?

Is Banksy just Jacob Rees-Mogg with an art degree?

It’s the question nobody is asking but I think it is worth thinking about. I don’t want to dwell on Jacob Rees-Mogg very long, so let’s do him first. The point I want to make is that Rees-Mogg claims to be speaking for the ‘ordinary man in the street’ but he is actually only interested in lowering taxes for billionaires and big business, and removing pesky rules and regulations that (by doing things like protecting the environment or workers’ rights) stop his friends making lots of money. He pretends to… Read more Is Banksy just Jacob Rees-Mogg with an art degree?

…which brings us to Kanye…

It was easy when it was Morrissey being awful. I don’t like him and I’m not especially fond of his music. But Kanye? Oh, man. I love Kanye’s music. I do. So when he’s wearing a MAGA hat in the White House I am not a happy bunny, because I know how Smiths fans feel, and it isn’t a good feeling, it’s a bad feeling. I don’t mind the texting at the theatre or any of the other non-stories that get written about him. But the Trump stuff. I don’t… Read more …which brings us to Kanye…

…and what do you do when your heroes turn out to be awful?

It used to be easy. There was the work, and you liked it, and then years later there were the revelations and they tainted your memories of your childhood but not your actual childhood. Now, with the internet, we get to find out in real time how awful everyone is. Consuming culture has become more complicated than ever. Which is just a fancy way of saying, ‘What about that Morrissey, eh? Blimey! Turns out he’s a massive racist.’ Only joking. Morrissey was never one of my heroes, I just liked… Read more …and what do you do when your heroes turn out to be awful?

So, should I stop watching Arrested Development?

I had stopped watching Arrested Development. I got less than halfway through the first episode of series four before turning it off. I had forgotten all about Arrested Development until Netflix remixed series four so it more closely followed the format of the first three series. And then I watched series four. And then I watched what they have so far released of series five. It isn’t as good as it used to be, is it? The drop in quality has been overshadowed by other things though, in particular the… Read more So, should I stop watching Arrested Development?